


how time and fate work

by lemonah



Category: Produce 101 (TV), X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2020-10-12 10:36:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20562905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lemonah/pseuds/lemonah
Summary: Hyeongjun has a hopeless crush on Hangyul since highschool. Yohan's attention is always caught by him as from then.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi i am here to water the yohlem and gyulem tag!! :D (yes, because why not both, right?) i actually haven't written for a long time and i just love these two pairings so i decided to write for them. i may also be slow in updating because there's so much to do in college. ;-; 
> 
> grammatical errors may be encountered. 
> 
> enjoy reading~

Hyeongjun is now finally breathing the same air with his high school crush, Lee Hangyul. They live in the same country, of course, but when Hangyul went to a different city to pursue college in his dream university, the two years Hyeongjun waited to be able to meet him felt like an eternity as if he will never ever see Hangyul again. He's just being overdramatic and got over it when he knew that the university is just one bus away from their home. The distance was also used to his advantage as he can go see Hangyul when he doesn't have something to do.

Hangyul actually got in because he applied as a varsity player for taekwondo. Hyeongjun learned that they are also giving scholarships for the members of their university dance team that's why he tried to audition and to his luck, he was accepted. Now, he's going to enter as a freshman student. 

"Hey," Eunsang tapped him just to get him out of his trance. "you keep on staring at the buildings. Aren't you going to be late for your first class?"

"Ah, no..." Hyeongjun said while still smiling, his eyes still fixed at the tallest building he can see. "I actually went early."

"Okay." Eunsang replied. He was planning to go alone and leave Hyeongjun but it looks like the other is not going to move anytime. "Come with me. Dongpyo said he'll treat us to lunch."

Hyeongjun eyes sparkled. Aside from the possibility of meeting Hangyul, free food sounds extra great. He's loving his first day so far.

ㅇㅇㅇ

On their way to the cafeteria, Hyeongjun halted his steps when a certain man he looked forward to meeting on this day came right in front of his eyes. He's not actually shocked that Hangyul became popular even in college. Who wouldn't notice his captivating visual, right?

Girls are on the side saying hi to him, while Hangyul only looks at them, barely smiling. They don't seem to mind and honestly if Hyeongjun is in their position, he thinks he'll be also fine with Hangyul just looking at him. 

However, Hangyul smiled at this one man. A man with a fair complexion and bunny teeth. Wait... his face is familiar to Hyeongjun.

"He has changed a lot, right?" Minhee spoke while placing the tray of meals Dongpyo ordered for them. "I think college really changes people... in good and bad ways."

"Wait.. you know him?" Hyeongjun is confused. Though the man is familiar, he can't remember who exactly he is.

"Please. That's Yohan! Kim Yohan." Dongpyo now sits with them. Hyeongjun almost didn't feel that Eunsang dragged him to sit.

"Kim Yohan? The taekwondo..."

"Yes. Hangyul's best friend!"

"Oh , right. I remember now!" Hyeongjun tried to look at Yohan one more time, but the two are not in the cafeteria anymore. "He has changed... a lot?"

"Not a lot. His style just improved, I think? And he doesn't keep his hair shaved unlike in high school." Dongpyo answers. 

Yohan was also their senior in high school. He remembers him as the senior who is always kind to his juniors like treating them as his younger siblings. There were a lot of times where he helped Hyeongjun in many ways. Oh what a good memory, he thought. Time flies fast that they now meet again in college. 

ㅇㅇㅇ

One month has passed and Hyeongjun has adjusted himself to college life. Although their university is just a bus away, he and his friends decided to stay in a dorm for convenience. 

He doesn't exactly know Hangyul's schedule, but thankfully he sees him frequently. Thank the heavens for letting him pass in this university. The two years of waiting was definitely worth it. Now his problem is how to befriend him knowing that they don't have much to talk to and they aren't classmates even in a general education course. They are each other's acquaintances, to say the least, because of how they were both members of the dance club in high school for just a year. And that was years ago, so Hyeongjun isn't sure if the other still remembers. 

"Dongpyo, let's say you like someone, how would you confess?"

Dongpyo, his roommate, was taking selfies on his bed when Hyeongjun asked. He paused what he was doing to look at the other with disbelief.

"Why? Are you going to confess to someone?" 

"Ah... no... I was just curious."

"You know that it's obvious when you lie so don't even attempt to do it." Dongpyo now sits beside him. "Who is it?"

He's wondering if he should tell, but Dongpyo is his best friend anyway. He'll eventually know it for sure. 

"You know that guy... our senior even in high school?"

"Kim Yohan? You're going to confess to Yohan hyung?" Dongpyo was in shock. If he remembers correctly, Hyeongjun almost didn't recognize him and now he's going to confess to him. But he can't blame him, though, Yohan is also a popular guy, not just as popular as Hangyul.

"No, not him!" Hyeongjun glared. "It's Hangyul. Lee Hangyul."

"Not actually surprising." Dongpyo replied dryly, as if expecting it if it's not Yohan that they are talking about. 

"What do you mean? Am I that obvious?" 

"No, I mean... almost everyone is crushing at Hangyul. Can't you see the reaction of people around him when he passes by? It's not a surprise."

Hyeongjun felt discouraged because of what he heard, his shoulders slumped and his face gloomed.

"So are you going to confess? How?"

"No, I changed my mind. I don't plan to continue it now."

"Hey." Dongpyo nudged his shoulder. "You should at least try. There are many who like him, so receiving a confession should not be new. Besides, they're gonna be busy next year and eventually, they'll graduate."

_They'll graduate... _

Hyeongjun waited two years for him to see Hangyul again. If he has two years remaining, he might as well do things without regrets.

"Fine. I'll do it."

ㅇㅇㅇ

Dongpyo came up with the idea of giving Hangyul a letter as a form of confession if Hyeongjun doesn't want to face him and directly say the things he wanted to say. Hyeongjun agreed because he just wants to tell him how he feels without expecting much. Do it without regrets, he told himself. 

Since he doesn't want to give it himself and having someone from their circle of friends do it makes it obvious that it's just one of them, Hyeongjun has put the letter on the table minutes before Hangyul (and Yohan because they're always together) go to their favourite spot in the library. Luckily, no one dares to pick up the lonely piece of paper, making it Hangyul to be the first one to touch it.

He watched from afar, pretending to read his book as he peered to see what Hangyul was going to do. To his surprise, Hangyul didn't even read it because of how he directly put it inside his bag, treating it as a paper not fitting the clear table.

Hyeongjun was disheartened. Hangyul is really out of his reach and his doors are clearly closed. Maybe he already has someone?

He was about to exit the library, his head down while walking when someone shouted.

"Hey, kid!" 

Hyeongjun was not going to look at where the voice came from because it's near Hangyul's seat, but the voice is so familiar to him.

_Oh. It's Yohan hyung._

Yohan stood up from his seat and left Hangyul (who is now looking at them curiously). Hyeongjun panicked. What if Yohan knew that he's the one who wrote the letter? He hasn't seen it though; Hangyul managed to put it inside his bag first without Yohan seeing it. What if Hangyul already knew it was him who wrote it and told Yohan to approach him? His eyes widened. This can't be. 

He smiled nervously at Yohan who is now in front of him.

"Where are you—"

Hyeongjun didn't even let him finish what he was asking when he bowed his head and ran away.

To his surprise, Yohan went after him. He felt his grip of his hand on his wrist immediately loosened when he stopped. Right, running must be an easy task for him considering that he's a part of the university taekwondo team.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..."

_Please don't mention the letter. Please... _

"Are you in a hurry, by the way? I was going to approach you the other day but we were called for an emergency meeting."

Hyeongjun looked at him for the first time. He surely smiles a lot, consistent with how he was back then.

"Ahh no... I just remembered that I don't have classes anymore." He hopes he believes his lame excuse because he needs to know the reason why he wanted to approach him.

"Oh, good! You were my junior in high school, right? I am not sure though... it's been years." Yohan shyly asked.

Hyeongjun just nods slowly, kinda confused about why the man in front of him became bashful all of the sudden. 

"_Hyeongjunie_... right?"

Hyeongjun was surprised. He didn't expect him, more of his name, to be recalled by this senior of him. It's been two years. He immediately bowed and said his formal greeting. 

"Hello. I am Song Hyeongjun, a 1st year student of BA Communication program. It is nice seeing you _again_, Yohan sunbaenim."

"Ahh.. what are you doing? Just drop that sunbaenim and just call me hyung." Yohan ruffled his hair like he's petting a puppy. 

He is the total opposite of him and Hangyul, who he thinks doesn't remember him any further. 

After making up an excuse that he has to meet his friends, Yohan retreated with his offer to treat Hyeongjun foods as a matter of greeting after finally meeting again.

ㅇㅇㅇ

Hyeongjun never knew that writing letters to Hangyul will give him a peace of mind, and at the same time the thrill that he has been looking for. Especially now that the upcoming tournament is getting near, he has been cheering Hangyul through his handwritten letters. Though, he isn't sure if he is reading those (he hopes he does). The only thing he's holding onto are his letters that aren't found on trash cans yet and have not become a laughing matter in the university. 

"That again?" Dongpyo asked, almost like a whisper when he sees Hyeongjun doodling something in class. "You're basically making a letter everyday."

"No, not everyday. I only make one per week. What are you saying?" Hyeongjun just glared at him.

"You know, I regret it. Just say it to his face or something. What if you're wasting your time doing that and he's not even sparing time to read them because he's a busy person." Dongpyo made sure to emphasize the last few words, but regretting it once he saw Hyeongjun's sad face.

"Okay..." He trails off. "I s-swear. This is gonna be the last one."

That was his plan.

Except that the letter he just recently made went missing. And he has put his name on it because he's planning to reveal himself. He isn't sure where he dropped it, if he did. Hyeongjun is carefully scanning every alley he had waked through earlier.

Hyeongjun panics when Hangyul is about to pass by him. He was about to give his letter today. Now. But it was nowhere to be found.

He shyly greeted the two (yes, Hangyul and Yohan are together every time) and to his surprise, Hangyul smiled at him.

Hangyul _smiled_ at him. 

Hyeongjun has to pinch his arm to test if it's a dream, but it hurts so this is the reality. And the reality is Hangyul, who rarely smiles at his "admirers", smiled at him.

However, that wave of happiness was immediately replaced by anxiety when he heard Yohan mentioning something about a letter. He followed them to hear some more, pretending to be going the same way when he's next class is in the opposite alley.

"So that kid hasn't given anything this week?" Yohan asked.

"I don't know. I haven't received any."

Yeah, right. How would he receive it if even Hyeongjun doesn't have it.

When he was about to go change his ways, he saw Yohan face his direction to look at him and smirked.


	2. Chapter 2

If you think you can't hate a gleeful creature, think again. Hyeongjun has never ever expected any of this to happen. From losing a goddamn letter (which to his luck, contains his name), to the letter being found by the one and only Kim Yohan, what a playful fate he has.

And now Yohan's reciting phrases of his work whenever he has a chance to do so.

"Hey, are you sick? Why are you so red?" Dongpyo can't help but notice. He was just staring at Yohan, who seems to be in a good mood, passing by before noticing Hyeongjun's reddening face. Dongpyo's remarks also got Junho's attention in which he placed the back of his hand on Hyeongjun's forehead. 

"You should go to the clinic and take some medications." Junho supplies. 

He excused himself from his friends to go to the clinic (which he didn't because he has to talk to Yohan. Immediately.)

He doesn't even know where he is going. It's his first time in this building due to the fact that he's not taking any subject here. He is in awe, mostly because of how he's the youngest in the area (yes, a lost freshman) and how his seniors look so cool in every way. He wishes to be like them in the future.

Yohan was nowhere to be found in this building and it will be such a waste of time to look for him when his next class starts in 15 minutes. However, to his luck again, he bumped into someone when he's about to turn and now he can feel something cold flowing on his shirt. _Oh no._

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..." He hears a low voice, a panicked one, and it was so familiar to him that even if he doesn't look at him in the face, he'll know who it is in an instant. He hopes it's really him.

And yes, _it's Lee Hangyul._

Hangyul, accidentally spilling a cup of coffee on him... who would have imagined? Even if this is one of the cliché disastrous meetings, Hyeongjun isn't actually complaining. 

The one he's been writing letters to is actually in front of him.

"I'm really sorry. It's my fault." Hyeongjun is still dazed. It's the closest position they have been in his life again.

"Ah.. it's okay."

"No, wait. I have an extra shirt. I'll let you use it." Hangyul drags him by his hand to the locker room. God. If it's a dream, he wishes to not wake him up. 

"Where have you been?" Dongpyo immediately ran to him when he saw him entering the room. "We went to the clinic to see if you're okay but you're not there."

"Yeah, Dongpyo was about to fight the young nurse there. He was literally describing you as 'he curly haired boy who looks like a kid but no he's a freshman'!" Eunsang imitated Dongpyo from earlier in which he earned a blow in the arm.

When they noticed that Hyeongjun was staring into the thin air, smiling and not actually responding to them, they got worried.

"Hey, what happened to you?" Junho genuinely asked.

"Oh. My. God." Minhee gasped. Now all of they're attention is on him. "Is that... is that Hangyul sunbaenim's shirt that you are wearing?" 

After hearing what Minhee had just said, they took a look on the shirt Hyeongjun is wearing. The latter has an evident blush on his face. It's pretty much obvious because of how Hangyul's name is printed on the shirt. It's one of the spare shirts I wear during training, he remembers his exact words.

"H-he spilled coffee on me earlier. He lent me his shirt because he said it's his fault." Hyeongjun explained, maybe talking a little too fast.

"Hangyul? Lee Hangyul lending someone his shirt? Hyeongjun you're so lucky!" Happiness and surprise is evident in Minhee's voice. 

Lucky. It's that one word he keeps on hearing ever since Hangyul held his hand earlier until people saw him wearing Hangyul's shirt.

ㅇㅇㅇ

Hyeongjun decided to return Hangyul's shirt in his free time this afternoon. He had washed it with his utmost care to make sure it would come back to him undamaged. He waited outside the locker room where Hangyul gave his shirt. Hangyul has mentioned that they train every afternoon especially now that the tournament is fast approaching. 

To his surprise, it is not Hangyul who came out of the room. It is Yohan.

He forgot about his initial plan of talking to him when he's the reason why he went to this building. Indirectly, he's also the reason why Hangyul spilled his drink onto him.

Surprise is evident on Yohan's face. However, it was immediately replaced by a smile as he rushed forward to where Hyeongjun is. 

"Hyeongjunie," The first thing he did was to pinch his cheeks. "what are you doing here?"

Hyeongjun smiled before asking.

"Is Hangyul sunbaenim inside?"

"Ah... Hangyul..." A mischievous grin plastered on Yohan's face.

Hyeongjun blushed. He knew that Yohan knows about him writing Hangyul letters and maybe it's the right time for him to talk to Yohan about it.

"And I need to talk to you too, hyung."

"About—"

Yohan's words were cut off when Hangyul came out of the room. He obviously just finished his shower as he is now drying his wet hair. Hyeongjun gulped.

"Kid," Hangyul raised his brows as a sign that he recognized him. "do you need something?"

Hyeongjun couldn't speak well. He has lost his ability to speak coherent words at the moment due to the nervousness he's feeling, that's why he just extended his arms to give the shirt Hangyul had lent him. He can also feel Yohan's gaze and his smile that meant nothing but mischief even if he's not meeting his eyes.

After Hangyul hesitantly got the shirt from him, he worriedly looked at him and was about to say something when Hyeongjun immediately ran away out of embarrassment. 

"Hyeongjun-ah, you said that we'll talk!" He can hear Yohan's voice echoing in the hallway, but his pounding heart is a lot louder.

ㅇㅇㅇ

Yohan laughed at the sight of Hyeongjun running. The boy must be an oddball at times, panicking over the sight of Hangyul. He reminds himself not to tease him again when they see each other. He kept on smiling and didn't notice it until Hangyul pointed it out.

"You seem to be very fond of him. Have you known each other?" Hangyul asked once they went back to the room.

"You don't remember him? He's from our high school." 

"I actually do. I didn't expect to see him here." Hangyul smiled too, as if recalling a nice memory. "We were both members of the dance club before."

It must be somehow surprising for Yohan that Hangyul also remembers him, but it can't be helped. There's really something about Hyeongjun that draws people in.

ㅇㅇㅇ

"Hangyul sunbaenim... remembers me?" Hyeongjun was clearly surprised, shocked even, to hear this information from Yohan, who is Hangyul's best friend. 

They are now staying inside a cafe near the university. Yohan said his supposed to be last class was cancelled and the timing was just right when he saw Hyeongjun who was looking for him. 

Hyeongjun was all sulky and planning to just say a few words to Yohan when they met, but Yohan said he'll say something that will make the other happy and will even pay for his drink. The younger gave in to this.

"Hey, hey." Yohan shushed him because he's being loud (not in an irritating way though). "But the letters..."

Hyeongjun was stunned and his face is now turning red. 

Yohan chuckled at the sight. Oh, how he loves teasing Hyeongjun. 

"Don't worry, he doesn't know."

Hyeongjun sighed in relief. 

"But I know right, and we're together all the time." Yohan wiggled his brows. 

"Hyung!" He panics a little before offering a bribe. "I'll do anything. Just don't tell it to him yet." He's preventing himself from cupping Hyeongjun's cheeks, or pinching them at the moment. He's just too cute.

"Do anything?" The older tilted his head in curiosity. He really doesn't have the plan to tell; he was just really teasing Hyeongjun because he likes seeing the variety of the reactions he's showing.

"Yes, anything!" Hyeongjun keeps nodding his head.

"Lately, I really get bored. I think I need someone to hang out with? I'm getting tired of Hangyul." He said the last sentence in a joking manner.

"Then.. I'll be with you. Wherever you want to go or whatever you want to do. How about that?" Hyeongjun proposed, eagerness evident in his eyes.

"Deal."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated! Thank you for reading. :^D


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more yohlem in this chapter!! :D

"First things first..." Yohan trails while they are walking side by side, thinking about what he's going to say while feeling those sets of eyes looking at them. He just shrugged at the unnecessary attention that they are getting. "My classes end at 3pm everyday, but my training starts at 5pm."

"What do you do in those 2 hours?" Hyeongjun inquired. The kid is surely mentally taking note of this new duty he has to attend. 

"Nothing. I just sleep?" 

Hyeongjun sighed. That's it. His job is already done before it even started.

"Then that's good–"

"That's why I want to experience going to some nearby arcade, or eating ice cream..." Yohan coughs as if he wants Hyeongjun to notice the things he just emphasized. 

"Sure, hyung. You have a kid to hangout with." Hyeongjun just snorts.**  
**

And that's how they end up at the nearby amusement park on a Wednesday afternoon. Not that Hyeongjun expected it to happen at this instant because really, who even has the time to enjoy a weekday especially that they're still in the middle of the week. 

Yohan is clearly enjoying the atmosphere, cheerfully dragging Hyeongjun to where he thinks looks fun. Hyeongjun became to be as hyped up as him that he didn't notice the hand clinging to his the moment they entered the venue. 

After playing so many games that Hyeongjun can't actually enumerate, they decided to rest at the side where the benches can be found. 

"I'm just here to remind you that since you lost the bet, you're gonna pay for my snacks this afternoon." Yohan smiled triumphantly, recalling that he scored just 4 points more than Hyeongjun in that basketball game.

"Hyung, it was just 4 points—" 

"But a bet is a bet, Hyeongjunie." Hyeongjun just pouted. What else can he do? He stood up before hearing a laugh that echoes just to his ears.

ㅇㅇㅇ

"Did Hangyul sunbaenim and Yohan sunbaenim fight?" Dongpyo inquires, making his voice low even if they are the only one sharing the room.

"No?" Hyeongjun answers while writing his notes. "Why did you ask?"

"It's just you two are frequently together." It is where curiosity made him look to Dongpyo. He knows that they are going out, but he didn't know it'll be that noticeable. Dongpyo is his best friend, so he should know what's the real deal, right?

"Actually... Yohan hyung already knew that I was writing letters to Hangyul sunbaenim."

It earned a dramatic gasp from Dongpyo. 

"That's you're spending time with him so that he won't tell?"

"He asked me to..." Hyeongjun's voice falters. 

As much as he sees this as a simple bribery, it does not feel like he is forced to do it, to just comply so Yohan won't reveal his secret. It feels like he's with a companion that genuinely cares for him and enjoys their time together like he does. So when he knew he had to explain more, it was too late when Dongpyo just nodded and got back to his work. 

But he didn't miss the smile that spread across Dongpyo's face. There's a lot going on his mind to further ask what that was about.

ㅇㅇㅇ

"Ice cream, hyung. You said you'll buy me one next time." Hyeongjun beams. "And the next time is this time."

Yohan groans before saying, "I thought you forgot about it."

He actually remembers it. There's a point where he is actually curious about the ice cream flavors Hyeongjun would like. It looks like he is the type to like strawberries. 

When they arrived at the ice cream parlor, it was just so satisfying to see Hyeongjun gape at the sight of different ice cream flavours lined in front of them. Yohan can't help but to giggle and pinch Hyeongjun's cheek a little.

"What do you like?" He asked, looking at the set of ice creams.

"Strawberry! But I also like mint choco..." Hyeongjun pouted before inquiring if they can mix flavors. 

“Wait, you like mint choco?” 

Hyeongjun turns to look at Yohan, surprised by the sudden inquiry. It may also be a shocking information for him because only a few people like it.

“Yes? Don’t tell me you’re one of the most people who don’t like it?” Hyeongjun pouts.

“No, no.” Yohan laughs at his reactions. “I actually like it!” He can't help but to smile at the younger's excitement upon hearing they like the same flavors.

“Alright, then. I’ll order additional scoops for it so we can share!”

Not just the ice cream, but maybe a part of Yohan also melts because of this indescribable feeling he feels to what Hyeongjun radiates. 

**   
  
**

ㅇㅇㅇ

The tournament is fast approaching and the training that the athletes have to go through intensifies. This also means that the time Hyeongjun and Yohan spend together became limited due to their tight schedule— training for Yohan, while accumulating school works for Hyeongjun.

Even if they don’t see that much like they used to before, it is only their physical absence that made the difference. They still do contact each other mostly through sending text messages. 

yohanie-hyung

Dinner later?

hyeongjunie

but you’re gonna go home late :(

yohanie-hyung

No.. i’m allowed to go home early today haha

hyeongjunie

allowed? or are you just gonna sneak your way out :p

yohanie-hyung

This is legal hahaha i promise

hyeongjunie

alright ^^

yohanie-hyung

See you later! I’ll go to your building 5pm

Today is a friday and it's their first time seeing each other again in two weeks. Hyeongjun has been extending his stay in the university to complete his requirements, going home mostly at 5-6pm when he has already finished his work. Same goes with Yohan who finishes his training at 9pm. The younger asked if he should wait for Yohan so they can go home together, but the other answered that it will be unsafe for him to go home at that hour so he must go first. (He just pouted because he feels like he’s being babied, but Yohan indeed says that he’s a baby.)

While putting his things in his bag, the memory that the cause of all of this is Hangyul and that one letter he should be sending him came back to his mind. He did not realize that it’s almost a month since that happened that he was actually so occupied with both college and Yohan, if he must admit, to forget about it.

“Going home early?” 

Hyeongjun thought that maybe it’s because he just thought of Hangyul that’s why he hears his voice now, but it’s really him who just spoke.

“S-sunbaenim…” He will always be nervous no matter how many times they have interacted. “Ah, yes…”

“No need to call me your sunbae. You can also call me hyung.” Hangyul said, smiling. “And do I intimidate you? Why do you always look so nervous?” He joked and it earned a nervous laugh from Hyeongjun.

“Ahh, no. It’s just that I'm in a hurry and I need to go.” After immediately bowing his head, Hyeongjun ran away to exit the library.

As he was in a hurry, he was too occupied to notice the small hole in the pavement. Just when he thought he was about to trip and fall to the floor, he landed on something soft that is contradicting what he expected. It is as if he fell into someone’s arms. 

“Hey, please be careful next time.” When he looked up, it was Yohan who was smiling at him.

Hyeongjun doesn’t know why, but it feels like everything is happening in slow motion. Is it because he’s tired, or due to the aftereffect of his tripping? Or maybe because it’s the first time he’s seeing Yohan again? He doesn’t know.

“Are you okay?” Yohan immediately checks on him.

“Y-yes, hyung.” 

“Be careful, alright? I won’t be here all the time. It’s just you’re lucky I was on my way.” 

Yohan not being there all the time makes him a little sad, but he just shrugged it off and nodded anyway.**  
**

“About the letter…” Yohan thought of dismissing the topic immediately as soon as the words fall from his lips. He wanted to ask, but he doesn't even know how to start. It was already too late when it caught Hyeongjun's attention. "Do you still write… to Hangyul?"

Hyeongjun shook his head lightly. He must admit that he was just letting the situation cool down.

"Of course, I need to be wary!" Hyeongjun explained. "What if you already told him about it?"

"I did not." Yohan just laughed at the younger glaring at him. He cupped both of his cheeks, which softened Hyeongjun's expression. He surely missed this kid. "Don't worry."

Later that night, Yohan volunteered himself to walk Hyeongjun home even if the younger insisted that their dorm was just nearby. 

"Tada~ We're here~" Hyeongjun singsongs. 

"Ahh why are you so cute?" The older can’t help but to pinch his cheeks. Hyeongjun notices that he’s doing it maybe a little too much too but he’s not complaining about it.

"You keep on saying that I'm cute." The younger pouted. "Go home now, hyung. It's getting late."

"It's just the truth, Hyeongjunie. I'll get going now. Don't trip again, okay?" Yohan teased him before waving his hand and turning to walk away.

As soon as Hyeongjun saw Yohan already turned his back to walk away, he also prepared himself to go inside. He was about to turn the knob when he felt a heavy weight on his back– it was Yohan back hugging him.

"Why? Did you miss me? It was just..." It was his turn to tease the older. It was Hyeongjun’s turn to tease Yohan because of how he is being clingy tonight, but the words falter when he feels the hug turned into a tighter one. A part of himself is asking himself why does he like it, but as of now he can’t find the answer. Maybe he can allow them to be in that position for a minute more. 

Yohan didn't answer, but he can feel his grip tightened not a bit much. Hyeongjun can also feel that Yohan rested his head on his shoulder and it made him a little tense. It happened to be quick and slow at the same time. 

Yohan lets go. He just ruffles Hyeongjun’s hair when their eyes meet. 

“Hyung…”

“I’ll really get going.” Yohan began to walk away. “And yes, I missed you.” He said it while facing the opposite road, his hand waving. The street was so quiet that’s why Hyeongjun clearly heard it.

He is clearly confused as to why his heart skipped a beat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i haven't updated in like,, two months? i've been very busy and i'm sorry if the scenes in this chapter look fragmented (or doesn't have a smooth transition,, how do i say it). anyway, thank you for reading!! kudos and comments are highly appreciated! :-D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short update for Hyeongjun's birthday. Once again, Happy Hyeongjun day!! 🥳🎂

Hyeongjun woke up from his bed, confused why Dongpyo is already out at this time of the day. He isn’t sure, but he remembers that his first class starts later than him. Maybe there is an errand that his friend needed to run to.

His day starts as usual with the difference of an early morning call from his parents greeting him a happy birthday. It feels weird though. Not that he is expecting, although it feels like his friends are missing because he hasn’t seen them until now. He can’t blame them because exams are everywhere, and maybe he's just not too busy like them as of the moment to be thinking of those. He pouts when he thinks that even his Yohan hyung hasn’t wished him a happy birthday when it is the older who’s eager about it a few days ago.

However, his worries disappeared when he saw Junho holding a balloon, which says “생”. He was followed by “일” on the balloon that was held by Eunsang. Dongpyo holds the cake while Minhee holds the party popper. Hyeongjun knows he can’t cry at the moment, but he can’t help especially that his friends show up suddenly to surprise him. They greeted him with a cheerful voice and sang a birthday song. His friends have really no shame; he bet that it was Minhee’s idea to begin with.

“Happy birthday, Hyeongjun!”

“I—what are you doing,” Hyeongjun whines, but he knows his friends take no offense at it by the way they are laughing at him. “You didn’t have to do this here.” He laughs.

“I swear just please blow the candle before it melts.” Minhee urged, making all of them laugh.

So Hyeongjun closed his eyes and made a wish before blowing it.

“I thought you forgot about it,” Hyeongjun wipes his tears. “I’m gonna sulk for real if you guys did.”

“How can we even forget? Hyung gathered us too—” What was Junho saying was cut short when Eunsang hit him with his elbow, signaling him to stop. Hyeongjun looked at them with confusion.

“Junho meant that how can we forget… looking at this preparation, how can we forget, right?” He looked at Minhee, who looked at him back before nodding.

“Thank you, guys! I know you are all busy, but you made time for this.” Hyeongjun initiated a group hug. “Let’s eat the cake in our apartment, shall we?”

“Sure!”

Hyeongjun was talking to Eunsang and Hyeongjun on their way to the apartment. Minhee and Dongpyo lag behind them so that Hyeongjun won’t hear what they are talking about.

“Don’t you think he deserves to know?” Minhee inquires.

“We promised Yohan hyung. He said Hyeongjun should not know no matter what happened.” Dongpyo hushed him. He actually wanted to tell Hyeongjun too, but the promise they made must not be broken.

“But… don’t you wonder why hyung prepared this?” The taller asked again. He initially received a shrug, so he continued. “I mean, sure, we could’ve prepared this, but not this grand. We don’t have money.” He said the last in the joking manner which made Dongpyo laugh out loud.

It made three of them look back at them. They just shrugged it off.

The surprise doesn’t end there. When he opened the door, the fully decorated living room welcomed them. Aside from the balloons, there are also foods served on the table, well prepared that Hyeongjun doesn’t have an idea that he will come home to this.

Of course, it was made possible by his friends, and Yohan.

“Oh no, Hyeongjun’s crying again.” Eunsang said while wiping the other’s tears.

“You did this? I said you didn’t have to…” Hyeongjun trails. “But thank you. All of it made me really happy.”

“Anything for you, birthday boy! Come on, let’s go inside.” Dongpyo welcomed the rest, since Hyeongjun isn’t in the state to do so. 

Hyeongjun didn't miss the note in the table though. He read what is written: "Try Hangyul's ramen because he's better at cooking it than me. ;) Happy birthday!"

He turned into a tomato in an instant. There was indeed ramen in a bowl covered. It looks freshly cooked so he turned to ask his friends.

"When did you have the time to prepare this?"

"Just a while ago…" Dongpyo answered. 

It was not only them, of course. He remembers going home that one afternoon, and Yohan asking him if he has something to do. At first, they are addressing him as sunbaenim, but Yohan insisted that they should just call him hyung. The five of them gathered to plan this surprise, with Yohan initiating it. 

Dongpyo is happy that aside from their circle of friends, there is someone who is looking after Hyeongjun.

"Oh… okay. Let's eat?"

When they were preparing the food, someone knocked at the door.

"I'll see who it is." Hyeongjun excused himself.

This day really offers a lot of surprises. His jaw almost dropped when he saw Yohan standing in front of him.

"Happy birthday!" Yohan gleefully greeted him before hugging him. 

"By the way, I have someone with me. He insisted on coming so…"

"Hangyul hyung?" Hyeongjun was clearly surprised. 

"Did you receive the ramen I cooked?" Hangyul laughed before ruffling his hair. "Happy birthday, Hyeongjun-ah."

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i miss hyeongjun and x1. ; _ ; idk if you noticed it, but i incorporated the acrostic poem yohan made haha  
your kind comments are always appreciated ^_^


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy birthday, Hangyul! 🥳🎂

It was going fast for him. All of the recent events were going fast for Hyeongjun. 

Ever since his birthday celebration, there have been few noticeable changes that had happened. Hangyul coming to his birthday is not something he expected, or imagined in his whole life. He went just because "training finished early and I got nothing to do," as he initially said. Yohan, of course, was subtly teasing him with his looks, which turns into a softer one when Hyeongjun reacts to it.

That day was just simple, but he didn't know it's going to be the start of changes he wasn't prepared to begin with.

"Hyeongjun-ah," Hangyul started to talk. "I still remember you, if you think I don't. I didn't come here because I was bored, or for the free food…” He chuckled in between, before continuing. “..but I came here because I want to celebrate your birthday with you." He sincerely smiled.

Hyeongjun doesn't know what to say, but just a ‘thank you’ to the person he admires for years. They were alone in the living room because the rest of the boys volunteered to clean the mess they made.

"If I win," Hangyul hesitantly started, but he continued anyway. "if our team wins, please make time for my birthday celebration which will be happening–"

"Next week!" Hyeongjun interjected. He immediately covered his mouth upon realizing what he did. 

"Alright." The older laughed. "See you, then?"

"Only if you win, hyung."

ㅇㅇㅇ

The competition will be happening on Hangyul's birthday, so surely winning in this would be the best birthday gift for him. What Hyeongjun knew is that it's going to happen a day before, but thanks to Yohan who keeps on pestering him to send good luck messages everyday or else he'll blame Hyeongjun for his lack of motivation. He wasn't forced to do so; he's willing to do it for him even without him saying.

hyeongjunie

tomorrow's the day... are u ready 

yohanie-hyung

Of course!! What do you take me for

hyeongjunie

as expected ㅋㅋㅋ

yohanie-hyung

can we meet later? we will be going home early to rest so...

hyeongjunie 

sure ^^ where??

yohanie-hyung

at the cafe near your apartment, 4pm

hyeongjunie 

okayy

Hyeongjun is just at their apartment the whole day because their professor in his one class called in sick, while his other subjects don't have a meeting for this day. Dongpyo says he envies him, as makes his way out to attend his class. It's a good thing Yohan chooses a location near him because they usually meet at places in the campus.

A sudden thought of his last conversation with Hangyul came to Hyeongjun's mind. He was thinking if he should return to writing him letters. Tomorrow's the competition, and as his admirer, he is thinking if he should cheer for him and greet him too through a letter. This might be the last one that he's doing it, especially that he doesn't have a reason to continue anymore. So he wrote one while putting all his feelings into it.

After writing, he prepared himself and decided to just go 15 minutes before their agreed time. Will he tell Yohan that Hangyul invited him to his birthday celebration? Or will he ask him if he told Hangyul to invite him? 

  
  


When he arrived at the location, he already saw Yohan sitting at the corner. Has it been a week since we last saw each other?, Hyeongjun thought. It was evident on the older's face that he was tired from the training, but his mood suddenly lightened when he saw Hyeongjun approaching him.

Yohan was just smiling at Hyeongjun as if the time suddenly stopped.

Hyeongjun noticed that he was in a trance, so he snapped his fingers on his face. "Are you okay?"

"Ahh, Hyeongjunie... of course." He answered with a smile. "What do you want to eat? My treat." Yohan immediately said before receiving another question from the younger.

"Wow, what is this. Are you really okay, hyung?" Hyeongjun laughed. "I'm okay with anything. Why did you want to meet, by the way? Did you miss me?" He proceeds to tease his hyung.

"What if I say I did?"

Hyeongjun gulped. He can't be the only one, it's actually mutual because he feels the same way. He doesn’t know why but he misses the time that they spend together without worrying about the things they should be prioritizing.

The rest of their time was spent on catching up on this week, with school, training, and the reality of life in between. In the end, Hyeongjun wasn't able to bring up the conversation he had with Hangyul.  
  


"Do you want a late night stroll?" Yohan asked. He was walking Hyeongjun back to his apartment. "Say yes then we will change our direction."

"You say that as if we're in a car." The younger chuckled. "We're just walking, Kim Yohan-ssi."

"Do you know that I can drive? I can even take you out of town, if you want to." 

Hyeongjun looked at him in the eyes to see if he was just lying. When he doesn’t look like one, he asked in response, "Is that a promise that I should look forward to, mister?"

"But you didn't even agree! What if I'll be charged for kidnapping you if you suddenly disappeared?" 

"Then I agree!" Hyeongjun beams. He'll surely look forward to it, to confirm if Yohan is just bluffing or not. "Rest now, hyung. You need it for tomorrow."

He's actually feeling guilty about taking Yohan's time. They were dismissed early, but the older chose to spend time with him. 

"Alright, alright. If you say so." Yohan nodded while he put his hands on his pockets. "Before I go, can I have a good luck hug?"

"Good luck hug? Does that exist?" Hyeongjun looked at him with a mix of confusion and curiosity. When he saw Yohan waiting for him to do it, he got no choice but to wrap his hands around him and hold him close. It was supposed to be quick, but Yohan hugged him back. 

Hyeongjun doesn't know why, but he really feels comfortable in this position.

"Good luck, hyung... Don't be nervous okay. I know you can do it." Hyeongjun said, almost a whisper.

He hears Yohan chortled. 

"What— why are you laughing?" The younger immediately pulled back to see his face.

"It's so much better when I actually hear it from you." The older answered, trying to stop himself from holding Hyeongjun’s cheeks. "We'll go out the day after the tournament, if that's okay with you... I will win this."

Hyeongjun nodded. He will surely look forward to it.

ㅇㅇㅇ

The day has come. If Hyeongjun must admit, he can’t even concentrate in his classes because he’s nervous for Yohan and Hangyul. He only has 30 minutes vacant, and he has classes on the time of the competition. He wanted to watch and even informed Yohan, but the other insisted he must attend his classes.

On his vacant, he went to Hangyul’s locker to put his “final” letter in it. The letter contains his good luck and birthday message, as well as his advanced congratulatory message. He knew Hangyul is going to do and has done his best prior to this, and he’s congratulating him now for that.

So he slowly went to the other’s locker and checked if no one was around. He carefully slipped the letter into it and went away.

  
  


“Are you okay?” Dongpyo asked when he went back. “You look pale. Are you good?”

“Yes...” Hyeongjun was just worried about what if someone caught him. This might be his last time doing it, so he wants it to go smoothly as much as possible.

“Okay.” The other went back to eating his food, but talked again when he remembered something. “Today’s the competition, right? Are you not going to watch?”

“We have classes, Dongpyo.”

“Ahh… right. Too bad.”

The hours of lecture feels like an eternity. Hyeongjun wished it to end already so he could come to support them, or check if they are still okay. He can’t help but to just sigh.

“Let’s support our taekwondo team. I heard the tournament’s about to be finished, so I’m dismissing the class early. See you next meeting.” The professor concluded. Hyeongjun hurried himself to go to the university gymnasium which is located at the other building.

“Where are you going?” He heard Minhee shouted.

“I’m going to watch!” Hyeongjun shouted back before he vanished from their sight.

  
  


Maybe he has arrived late, or not. When he arrived at the venue, he heard the crowd already cheering. Already confused about what’s happening, Hyeongjun continued to walk until he could see the players. But what he saw was the university team bowing their heads. He felt the combination of relief and joy when he saw the gold medals hanging on their necks. Even him was in pure bliss.

“Hyung, congrats!” He shouted while looking at Yohan. He doesn’t expect the other to hear him due to the loud cheering of the audience, but Yohan searched where the voice came from. When he finally found Hyeongjun, he came into him, running. 

Hangyul followed him too. So both of them are going in his direction.

He was looking at Hangyul all throughout. He welcomed him with a smile and said his congratulations. He was then distracted when Yohan coughed.

“I know you can make it.” Hyeongjun said to him. “Congrats, hyung.”

“Are you two close to each other?” Hangyul inquired.

Hyeongjun just looked at Yohan for the answer, but the other was just looking at him. But before they could say anything, Hangyul already spoke.

“Anyway, don’t forget about later.” He faced Hyeongjun. Right, it is Hangyul’s birthday today.

“Ahh, yes. Happy birthday, hyung.” Hyeongjun nodded, then smiled.

When he looked back again at Yohan, he wasn’t smiling as he was earlier.

  
  


ㅇㅇㅇ

He wanted to bring Dongpyo with him, or Minhee, but they are not available now. Hangyul told Hyeongjun to bring his friends with him since they already met at his birthday’s celebration. Too bad they have a prior commitment. To his luck, he will go alone.

yohanie-hyung

Do you want to go together? Are you with your friends?

hyeongjunie

yes pls.. they are all busyᅲᅲ

yohanie-hyung

Okay.. I'll be there in 10 mins

  
  


“Ahh, hyung. You’re really my life saver.” Hyeongjun first said when he opened the door and saw Yohan standing.

“Of course.” The older winked, and Hyeongjun grimaced at it. It just made Yohan laugh.

  
  


They arrived at the place and Hangyul welcomed them. At first, he was confused why they went together when he expected Hyeongjun to be coming with his friends.

“Happy birthday, hyung! Congratulations again.” Hyeongjun greeted him gleefully. He handed him a small gift, that is really just so small he just put it in his pocket. Yohan was surprised by the gift too.

“Thanks.” Hangyul accepted it while smiling. “Come in?”

The celebration is just as usual, with his seniors drinking and mostly talking to each other. Yohan, however, prohibited him from drinking. He just pouted, but he agreed anyway. Sooner, Minhee and the rest of his friends came. He wasn’t even informed that they will follow, that’s why it looks like it was only him who is surprised. 

The seniors are nice to not exclude them despite their age. They were also accommodating, offering help and assistance to them if needed. Hyeongjun and his friends were invited to stay upstairs where they could watch movies if they wanted. The younger ones agreed because they don’t want to spoil the fun that the adults are having.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna stay here?” Yohan asked.

“It’s fine. I’m with my friends.” Hyeongjun said before disappearing in the crowd of people. 

Almost three hours later, Hyeongjun and his friends decided to go home. When they went down, most people were sleeping due to drunkenness. Even Yohan is sleeping peacefully on the sofa. Hyeongjun sighed. It looks like he will not be able to say that they will be about to go home. 

However, Hangyul is still awake, cleaning the mess.

“Should we help hyung?” Eunsang asked them. They all agreed to help, but Hangyul said that they should get going and he can manage it alone. He even insisted on driving them back to their apartment. Hyeongjun was surprised that Hangyul can drive too.

They refused at first, but Hangyul used his “it’s my birthday” card to them, which ended with him bringing the younger ones home. Dongpyo offered a sleep-over to the rest.

“Thank you, hyung.” They all bowed. “Take care on your way back.” Hyeongjun spoke.

Dongpyo, Minhee, Eunsang and Junho proceeded to go first, and when Hyeongjun was about to go inside after he had bid his goodbyes, he heard Hangyul speak.

“The letter… it was you, right?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> among the birthdays of these three, it is only on yohan that i wasn't able to update... pls blame college for that  
pls let me know of your feedback. thank you for still reading!! kudos and comments are highly appreciated! （＾∀＾）


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, updating again after 6 months: surprise!

Hyeongjun stopped in his tracks upon hearing that. He thinks he may be hearing things wrong that he doesn't know if he's going to look back or just continue walking. But he knew he had to do something when he heard Hangyul speak again. 

"All of them... came from you, right?"

He managed to look at Hangyul, mainly due to surprise because he said all. Hangyul doesn't look like he's curious, he looks like he's expecting, at least, to Hyeongjun's clouded mind.

"Hyung, I'm sorry." Hyeongjun immediately bowed his head. "I'm sorry if I bothered you. I was just... I was..." _admiring you for a long time._ He wasn't able to continue what he was trying to say now that the embarrassment is washing over him. He cannot even look the older in the eyes.

He closed his eyes when he heard Hangyul coming closer, feeling a gentle nudge on his arm. It was too quick though, as if Hangyul is being mindful of his actions too.

"Hey, it's okay." Does he hear him laughing? "I mean, I find it cute." Hyeongjun can feel his face burning at that. "See you tomorrow?" 

He opened his eyes to see Hangyul smiling at him.

Wait, did he say tomorrow?

ㅇㅇㅇ

"Hey, are you okay? Looks like you stayed awake overnight." Minhee remarked. His friends were already eating breakfast when Hyeongjun went down. 

Hyeongjun just nodded his head. He wants to sleep but everytime he closes his eyes, the scene yesterday night keeps on replaying in his head. He even took a bath before eating his breakfast in the hope of it helping him to clear his mind.

"Dongpyo," Hyeongjun approached him. "Hangyul hyung... he already knows about it."

Dongpyo gasped in response. "It? Are you talking about your letters?"

"What do we do? What do I do?"

"You didn't do anything wrong, right? It's just a letter so don't think much about it." His friend reassured him. He just hopes everything will be fine. 

Or not.

Yohan messaged him that he's not feeling well, and it's the reason why he can't fulfill his promise of having a road trip with Hyeongjun. He initially felt sad, but he must admit he kind of forgot about it because of the recent event. Hyeongjun also thinks what if Yohan decided to disclose it to Hangyul, and maybe what he said is just an excuse. Either way, he can't seem to be mad at the other as the only thing he's been feeling now is worry. 

He called Yohan, nervousness starting to creep into him as the phone rings. Mainly because it's the older who is mostly calling him. Hyeongjun welcomed Yohan's sick voice.

"Hyeongjun-ah," Yohan tried to sound cheerful but he can't hide his tired voice. "Did you arrive safely?"

"Yes, hyung." Maybe the letter can wait. "You sound really sick. Are you okay? Are you still in Hangyul hyung's house?"

"No, I just arrived here in my apartment. Wait, I actually feel dizzy.. Let's talk later, okay?"

Yohan hung up the phone. Hyeongjun thinks it's very unusual because it's unlikely for the other to just dismiss the call like that. He wasted no time to go to his apartment to check on him when he saw Hangyul approaching. 

"Off to somewhere?" Hangyul welcomed him with a smile. 

"Yes, Yohan hyung is sick.. I think I should go check up on him."

"Oh, okay. I actually have my car with me. We can visit him together."

Hyeongjun finds it surreal to be in the same place close to Hangyul, let alone to be riding in his car. Aside from this, he usually walks or takes public transportation to begin with. Hangyul noticed that Hyeongjun hadn't put his seat belt on so he leaned closer to do it for him. The younger stiffened at this action, but decided to laugh it out when he heard Hangyul chuckled. 

"Don't worry, I'll drive more safely for you." He joked.

The journey was awkward that Hyeongjun didn't know if he regretted joining. Neither of them talks until Hangyul decided to break the silence.

"Yohan wasn't able to mention that he's feeling sick though." Hangyul shook his head lightly, remembering if it was noticeable earlier. Yohan left earlier than he had expected because usually he's the type to laze around Hangyul's apartment if he doesn't have anything to do.

"Ahh, by the way," Hangyul continues. "You must be surprised that I knew about those. I won't take it against you, so please don't be awkward with me."

Hyeongjun's face suddenly became red. The mention of the letter alone made him feel like his suppressed emotions have come ablaze.

In no time, they arrived at Yohan's place. The door wasn't even locked.

"Hyung!" Hyeongjun called. He proceeded to his bedroom when Yohan wasn't answering. 

Hyeongjun found Yohan in his bed, sleeping. He touched his forehead only for him to say that he has a fever.

"Hyung, Yohan hyung has a fever."

Hangyul rushed to check up on him. He truly has it.

"Wait a minute. Let's put a wet towel on top of his forehead to lower his temperature." Hangyul proceeded on preparing one. Hyeongjun is worried. He hasn't seen Yohan sick ever.

"He needs to eat once he has woken up. I'll just buy medicines and food. I will be right back."

"Okay, hyung."

The time moves feels agonizingly slow today, but at the same time it is something that Hyeongjun has abandoned his awareness of. The sun is about to settle, he knows, not by the view from the outside. It is from the way the orange colors the room they are in. Yohan has woken up earlier just to eat a little and drink his medicine. Hangyul also stays. There is a bit of awkwardness between them, though it is somewhat manageable to bear.

Yohan is sleeping more peacefully than he was earlier and it eases Hyeongjun's worry. He hasn't realized that he started drifting to sleep, with his head resting on the space beside Yohan's arm, as the weight of today's stress dawned on him.

He might have heard Yohan say the words _ stay with me_, he is not sure if it's real, but then he does.

  
  


Hyeongjun woke up the next day with him laying down on the bed instead. He was confused upon waking up in a different room and not for a while that he remembered his Yohan hyung that should be sleeping on the very same bed he is on. 

"Oh, you're already awake?" Yohan greeted him with his usual self, as if he was not laying all day yesterday. 

"Hyung, are you okay?" He is still worried. The older should use the time to fully recover. 

"Don't worry, I'm all good!" He walked towards him. "And thank you, really. I never thought you'll go through great lengths of coming here." Hyeongjun scrunched when the other petted his hair.

"Good thing I really came here." Hyeongjun said proudly. "I was with Hangyul hyung though. Where is him?" 

"He already left early when he saw that I'm good to go." He grins. "By the way, he asked me to tell you to go to the park on Friday? He didn't say the reason."

Crap. 

ㅇㅇㅇ

Days went fast and it's already Friday. Specifically, the_ I am waiting in the park because Hangyul told me to do so _ Friday. He's not quite sure about the reason why they have to meet, but since maybe seeing each other normally like this will ease the tension between them (he hopes).

Or so he thinks. 

Because how can this ease the tension if they are talking about the topic that makes them awkward with each other. He doesn't know if Hangyul just wanted to clear things out, or he just wanted to see how he would react to it. So here he is now, feeling greatly embarrassed while talking about it. 

"It's just because I admire you, I swear." He said, a little louder more than it should be. Hyeongjun feels like defending something he should have not done.

Hangyul laughs. "I am not telling you to explain about it further, silly. I just wanted to tell you that I knew about it from the start… and I find it cute."

Hyeongjun's face turned into the color of a tomato. Knowing it from Hangyul himself is so embarrassing that he wishes the ground could eat him alive at the moment.

"You're not really good at hiding, you know?" Hangyul looked at him, smiled. Not the smile that he is mocking him and it made him remember what he liked about him in the first place. "Just when I'm going to do something about it, you already stopped sending them."

He just listens because he thinks he still has something to say.

"I don't know why I want to know this but why did you stop?"

"I don't have the confidence to continue writing. I mean, even Yohan hyung knows. And the worry about you knowing it is just there…" Hyeongjun paused for a while, finding better words to explain himself. "The feeling of rejection, even though I most likely expected it... is fearsome. Sending you those letters is the very thing I can muster myself doing. I decided it's enough."

"So you just decided to give up?" Hangyul looked at Hyeongjun like he wanted him to say something he still wanted to hear, but Hyeongjun doesn't even know the right words to say.

"It's not giving up, hyung." The younger said, but the way his shoulders slumped admitted his defeat. "I think it's like saying it's just what is needed."

He almost forgot how Yohan has a big part in the situation he is in, but that's for another time of thinking. Hyeongjun doesn't realize that he gave up in the process of just letting the condition cool down—that he is actually okay stopping it overall. 

"Well, I guess I'm late." Hangyul looks like he's the one being rejected. "But just so you know, you don't know what will happen if you don't actually try." He ruffled again then stood up to leave.

"See you again?" The older waved his hand. "Soon."

Hyeongjun was dumbfounded. He still hasn't processed what Hangyul said, about what does it imply and who does it apply to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this update might be a rollercoaster ride idk
> 
> ok i have so much to say... first of all a huge Thank You to all who are reading this. i honestly i don't feel like continuing this after what happened but logging in and getting notified of your comments and reading them made me change my mind. so i might really finish this (i hope you're still reading haha). 
> 
> i just posted this chapter because it has been on my drafts, unfinished, for a very long time and i actually forgot about it... icb. this update is not officially my "comeback". i apologize for the really really slow updates (the 6 months is screaming at me). i wish i have enough time because life is so eventful recently.
> 
> once again, kudos and comments are very much appreciated. they are so powerful in giving the motivation. ily all


	7. Chapter 7

Days had passed since Hyeongjun and Hangyul talked but the last words that the older said still linger in his mind. The mystery that it left got him thinking like his brain has been trying to hold onto something akin to sand slipping in his hands. Hyeongjun’s thoughts come into a halt when he hears a snap in front of him.

“Thinking about something?”

He notices how Yohan smiles, a cup of ice cream in front of him. They are in their usual hangout place and what they are right now just suddenly made sense to him as if they were not staying there for the past thirty minutes. 

“Don’t say no. You clearly are.” Yohan’s smile doesn’t falter, but the spark in his eyes lose a little. He is not in the right headspace to make something out of it. “You can tell me if you want.”

“Hyung,” there’s a pause, a hesitance before he speaks again, “did you really not tell Hangyul hyung about the letters?”

“Of course! What do you take me for?” He said jokingly before the realization hits him. “Wait, he—“

Hyeongjun squinted his eyes, scrutinizing the older’s expression to see any sign of dishonesty only to find none. He nodded. The man in front of him doesn’t look like he’s lying, and he knows he is not the type to do so.

“I really did not…” 

“I believe you, hyung.” Hyeongjun sincerely meant it. He hopes he appears that way. There is no doubt that Yohan would not do it. “Maybe he’s right that I’m not really good at hiding.”

“You two, you already talked about it?” Yohan paused. “Oh, that. When you meet on Friday, isn't it?”

“Yes. Then he said something I really didn’t understand.” Then Hyeongjun proceeded to tell him about it.

ㅇㅇㅇ

The next week came and they are drifting away from the stress-free days of the semester (though there are barely ones). Hyeongjun entered the room, yawning and not literally in his own self. Requirements are piling up and sleepless days are starting. He even woke up late this morning with him realizing that he only had 30 minutes left before his first class. He's the type to extend his sleep rather than eat his breakfast. 

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Hyeongjun whines upon answering Dongpyo's call.

_ "Sorry. You didn't tell me! Besides, I don't know, maybe you wanted to skip your classes to sleep more?" _Dongpyo replied over the line, a little defensive about his actions. 

Hyeongjun was going to babble about it a little more, but good thing his professor called in sick so he's free in his first class. A classmate was nice enough to tell him that before he makes his way to the notice in front. Just when he was thinking whether he will probably grab his breakfast or sleep at the library, something on his desk caught his attention. 

Oh.

Hyeongjun wasn't sure if this breakfast was already on his chair before he got in, but he's noticing it now just before leaving the room.

"Dongpyo," he hasn't hung up yet. "is this from you? As a form of apology or something?"

_ "From me? What?" _

"Breakfast! It's on my desk." He makes his way to it, blinking twice to see if he is seeing it because it is really there and not because he is hungry.

_ "No? It may be a wrong delivery. Have you seen where it is from?" _He checked and there is a note on it. It was folded like it's meant to catch the attention, but the way the paper was kept tells that it should be opened by the person it was sent to. Hyeongjun silently apologizes for intruding if ever it was really not for him.

"Wait, there's a note. It says—" He opened it, careful and slow so that the paper won't accidentally be torn. He read it aloud for Dongpyo to hear.

_ Don't skip your breakfast, Hyeongjunie. _

_ from Hangyul hyung :D _

_ "From Hangyul hyung?!" _

There was a silence in the air before Dongpyo shouted at him.

ㅇㅇㅇ

And it happened to be a reoccurring trend: a breakfast would come along Hyeongjun's way, on his desk at times he expected it the least. There were even notes pasted on his locker having messages meant to cheer. One time a lunch prepared that was brought to him by one of his classmates, saying that the sender refused to reveal himself. But it was no secret, he knew it was Hangyul all along.

Though Hangyul never met him directly ever since he started sending things, he makes sure that his presence is felt through his actions. It creates confusion in Hyeongjun. 

"Hangyul hyung is doing these weird things." Hyeongjun opened up when he and Yohan were making their way to their usual hang out spot after their classes.

"Weird things?" Yohan turned to look at him.

"He keeps on sending me food." The younger one looked at the ground, too shy to even look at Yohan. He doesn't know why but saying those make him embarrassed. "A-and putting notes on my locker. Things like that."

"Dumbass." Yohan blurted though not offensive in tone. "Can't you tell that he likes you?" 

"Me? What—" Shock was evident on his face. Hangyul likes him? No way.

"I'd do the same." Yohan walked slowly and Hyeongjun had to keep his pace with him. He lifted his gaze to look at him, about to ask what he meant when the older continued to speak. "I mean, it is not hard to like you, Hyeongjun."

Hyeongjun just continued to look at him, silently begging him to say something again, to continue his unfinished premise. There still has to be something. 

"Weeks had passed. And I can't believe I have to decipher it to you." Yohan just laughed, but his smile didn't reach his eyes. He felt a ruffle on his hair, then the older's hand went to pat on his shoulder. 

"I forgot I had a prior meeting today." He smiled before walking away. "Meet Hangyul. He must be waiting for you."

ㅇㅇㅇ

When Hyeongjun talked about what Hangyul said when they met, Yohan immediately understood what Hangyul was implying. He isn’t sure if it was needed to be explained, or if he even has the right to do so. Maybe meddling with them will only cause trouble. 

He refused to tell Hyeongjun about Hangyul's true intentions, but knowing the younger, he won’t probably get it unless someone has to uncover it for him. His mind is changing frequently maybe because of his prevailing selfishness. Hangyul approached and talked to him two days prior and it helped him finalize his decision.

"Are you and Hyeongjun... a thing?" He asked it straight to the point upon seeing each other. It hits something in Yohan's chest, but he tried his best not to let it show.

"No," he smiled, not so genuine. "We are not."

"You seem to have gotten closer than before." Hangyul sat on the space next to Yohan's. They are best friends and it shouldn't be awkward at the moment, but it is. "I don't know if it's too much to ask."

Yohan looked at him. "Go on."

"I plan to court him. Seriously this time."

He's saying this as if he's asking for his permission. Of course, he can. But does he _ want _ him to? The answer lies deeply in him that he, himself, does not even want to know. 

Hyeongjun likes Hangyul to begin with, and Hangyul likes him back. Yohan thinks he now knows the answer whether he'll tell the younger or not.

And he let him know him just now. 

He even pretended to have a prior plan when in fact, he is always making sure that his time after class is always freed. He doesn't mean to ruin things for his best friend and Hyeongjun. He fished his phone out of his pocket to text Hangyul.

_ come out now. i told him to meet you. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wasn't able to update mid-july but here it is :D it shorter than what i expected (had to cut short and will include it next chapter) so yeah i hope it didn't disappoint 😓 i also plan to end it in maybe 2-3 chapters. i will do my best to do justice to each character so don't worry ig dksdk
> 
> again, thank you very much for still reading. your kind comments keep me motivated to write („• ֊ •„)

**Author's Note:**

> edit (as of june 12, 2020): thank you for the nice comments!! those give me the motivation and inspiration to continue and finish this. sadly, i don't have the time to do so at the moment BUT i think (most probably bc i don't wanna give false hopes) i will be back around mid-july sooo until then pls don't forget ?? this. 🥺 ily all pls take care of yourselves and stay safe. <3


End file.
